They do say that absence makes the heart grow fonder. While this is often the case, it conflicts with another piece of common sense, namely “out of sight, out of mind.” This is a bit of a quandary for those who might be feeling their current relationship is stagnating and needs an injection of affection and fondness to bring it back to life.
So, how can you give a guy space to miss you but without veering into the negative territory of “out of sight, out of mind”? We will try to offer some important tips on this in this article.
Giving a Guy Space to Miss You – Top Tips
The key principle to follow when trying to give someone the space they might need to develop strong feelings of missing you is to be absent enough that they yearn for your presence, but while reminding them that you are still there for them and won’t be away for too long. In other (slightly conflicting) words, you have to be there for them while not being there in person.
Don’t Call or Text (But Be Visible)
In the modern world, the first thing to do when giving someone space is to ensure you neither crowd them digitally or physically. If you’re not there, then the latter is done, but the former may take a little more will power on your part. It’s quite easy to feel as though one’s space is being violated even when receiving digital communications like phone calls, SMS messages or WhatsApp messages.
The key to getting the desired outcome here is to offer some digital visibility such as posting to your social media accounts, but not sending anything directly to your significant other. In this way, you remain visible to them, and you are showing them that you have your own life and interests even when they’re not around. This does wonders for spurring the kind of emotional response you’re looking for whereby this guy will miss you like crazy.
Don’t overplay your hand, however, such as posting pictures of yourself with lots of other good-looking guys, or doing things that you know the guy doesn’t like. This won’t engender positive feelings from your man.
Don’t Respond to Texts Immediately
If he texts you, the best thing you can do is not respond straight away. Remember that you’re trying to give them the space to miss you. If they’re texting you, then it seems your mission to have them miss you is just about successful. However, it’s always best to keep that flame burning by not answering straight away. It heightens the feeling of your absence, and will thus strengthen their yearning for you.
Once again, a balance is required to get the best result. We’re not suggesting that you leave text messages answered for hours on end. Too long a gap might see them try to find comfort elsewhere, if you know what we mean. Leave it for at least 10 minutes before responding, and anywhere up to an hour for the best chance of ideal results.
Just as it’s a good idea to create a visible presence for yourself online to make them miss you more, you should also make yourself visible in your man’s living space or wherever he is. You could, for example, prepare food for him and leave it there, or send him a gift to enjoy while you’re not there. Photos of the two of you in key visible places will also do wonders. These mementos will help keep that fire going of him missing you.
Make Him Laugh
On the select moments you do decide to send him a message, it can be a good idea to make it something funny. The ideal kind would be something that pertains to an inside joke that the two of you share. This will remind him of the bond that exists between the two of you, and making him laugh is just another way to draw out all of his positive feelings and dispositions towards you.
Some say that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, and while this is true for most, it’s not the only way. Men feel most strongly about people who can make them laugh, and if you’re that person, now’s the time to play that card.
Organize a Surprise in Your Absence
On top of the mementos that you leave about the place, how about you arrange a little surprise for the guy while you’re not together? It could be something simple like a delivery of his favorite food with a note, or a cake or dessert that you’ve arranged. You could also gift them something on iTunes or a streaming service they use, giving them something to watch while you’re not there. Such simple things can seem tokenistic, but you’d be surprised how far it can reach into someone’s heart.
Encourage Him to Spend Time with Friends
Finally, while the two of you are apart, encourage him to spend time with his friends catching up and having fun. This might seem strange since it seems to be encouraging him to do things that would help him forget you’re not around. In fact, the most frequent result would actually be that he wishes you were there with him doing those things, either eating/drinking with friends or engaging in some other activity they like such as paintball, sports, or gaming, etc. This feeling is one that will ultimately strengthen the bond between you.
Keep Sight of the Goal: Missing You, Not Resenting You
It’s important when you give a guy the space he needs to miss you that you don’t overplay your hand or cause any resentment between the two of you. For example, littering your social media with photos of you spending time with other attractive men, as innocent as it may be, can drive a wedge between you and create negative emotions. It’s one thing to show that you have your own life, but behavior such as that could be viewed simply as taunting.
Therefore, be sure to strike a good balance to maintain positive emotions between the two of you. When you give him space in the right amounts, he’ll come back to you often far more and appreciative of you and affectionate, so the effort is nearly always worthwhile.